Sunday, July 03, 2005

- Senator Hagel Launches New Strategy

Senator Hagel, a likely Presidential Candidate in 2008, has launched a new public relations strategy based on his observations of Democratic fence straddling techniques used in the 2004 campaign. Hagel's recent quote about Iraq was picked up by MoveOn for use in one of their anti-war television ads and print campaigns. It is certain to increase his name recognition and raise his popularity with the far-left Democrats who own that party.

A spokesman for Hagel said, "Yes, It's a new strategy. We think being on both sides of every issue is a winning strategy, but you have to push it to the limit if you want to succeed. We are starting our Presidential campaign now and we are going to run for both the Republican and Democratic nominations simultaneously. In the August 2008 timeframe, we're going to switch to the Independent party, win that nomination and capture the votes of all the people on the far-left and the far-right plus the Greens and Libertarians.

We'll let Hillary and Condi fight it out over the folks in the middle. We believe the voters we draw away from both the Republicans and Democrats will allow us to win the race and claim a mandate without having to define any real agenda or policy."

Campaign strategist Bob Shrump said, "I think this sounds like a winning strategy. Where do I sign up to run this campaign?"
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